The dead pool
Whose humans get automated next? Anonymous voting, one vote per company per day. The notes are the editor's, the votes are yours, the future is nobody's.
| company | votes | ||
|---|---|---|---|
| 1. | IBM IBM rebalances its workforce, a verb that means firing people |
2 | |
| 2. | Klarna Klarna's 700-person AI victory lap quietly reverses |
1 | |
| 3. | OpenAI OpenAI fires humans for doing what OpenAI does |
1 | |
| 4. | Salesforce Salesforce finds a billion reasons to restructure its workforce |
1 | |
| 5. | Coinbase Coinbase speeds up support testing, slows down having employees |
0 | |
| 6. | Tamedia Tamedia trims 34 more jobs from newsrooms covering layoffs |
0 | |
| 7. | Future Google's AI Overviews overview the traffic right out of Future |
0 | |
| 8. | IG Group IG Group's CTOs exit, AI ambitions remain fully staffed |
0 | |
| 9. | Snap Snap restructures 1,000 people into a footnote |
0 | |
| 10. | Sapiens Private equity buys Sapiens, fires the wisdom part |
0 | |
| 11. | Deutsche Telekom Frag Magenta answers 2.6 million calls, zero of them awkward |
0 | |
| 12. | BBC BBC cuts 2,000 jobs the old-fashioned way, one drip at a time |
0 | |
| 13. | NBCUniversal NBCUniversal streams profitability, drains staff |
0 | |
| 14. | Duolingo Duolingo's owl eats 10 percent of the contractors |
0 | |
| 15. | VerSe Dailyhunt parent automates the humans out of the hunt |
0 | |
| 16. | Warhorse Studios Warhorse Studios localizes its empathy into a machine |
0 | |
| 17. | Wonder Wonder fires 150 humans, hires robots to lose money faster |
0 | |
| 18. | Square Enix Square Enix levels up its org chart, London falls off a cliff |
0 | |
| 19. | Rogers Rogers cuts customer service agents, hold music stays fully staffed |
0 | |
| 20. | SOFTSWISS SOFTSWISS AI chief says the quiet part at full volume |
0 | |
| 21. | CMS CMS redesigns teams around tech, support staff left out of frame |
0 | |
| 22. | Eidos-Montréal Eidos-Montréal trims 124 jobs, 'changing project needs' takes the blame |
0 | |
| 23. | Moonshot AI AI writes a compiler in 10 hours, engineers write resignation letters |
0 | |
| 24. | General Motors Factory Zero gets closer to actual zero |
0 | |
| 25. | Oracle Oracle sends layoffs at 6 AM, before the humans can object |
0 | |
| 26. | Manulife Manulife shutters Malaysia tech unit, 300 jobs unplugged |
0 | |
| 27. | Fiverr Fiverr's gig economy meets an economy of zero gigs |
0 | |
| 28. | Lucid Lucid's connectivity director disconnects after nine years |
0 | |
| 29. | Edward Jones Edward Jones trims up to 1,000 jobs, leads change with integrity |
0 | |
| 30. | State Farm State Farm agents learn good neighbors need fewer humans |
0 | |
| 31. | Heriot-Watt University Heriot-Watt declines to translate 41 jobs into a future |
0 | |
| 32. | University of Birmingham Birmingham fails a transparency test, translates five jobs into none |
0 | |
| 33. | PwC PwC's CEO offers staff a choice: adapt or evaporate |
0 | |
| 34. | Block Block blames AI for 4,000 jobs Dorsey admits he overhired for |
0 | |
| 35. | Meta Meta's AI safety team didn't survive contact with Meta |
0 | |
| 36. | BNY BNY finds algorithms better at counting trillions, people not included |
0 | |
| 37. | Nike Nike trims a division, not a swoosh in sight |
0 | |
| 38. | SSENSE SSENSE develops a sharp eye for layoffs |
0 | |
| 39. | Atlassian Atlassian execs huddle, staff get the agenda later |
0 | |
| 40. | Evonik Evonik cuts 3,200 jobs just to prove it can do it alone |
0 | |
| 41. | Equity Bank Equity Bank staff invited to reapply for their own jobs |
0 | |
| 42. | Ping An Ping An's AI writes the code and answers the phones |
0 | |
| 43. | Sanofi Sanofi upgrades its bots from obedient to autonomous |
0 | |
| 44. | Commonwealth Bank Commonwealth Bank cuts 230 jobs, calls it a future workforce program |
0 | |
| 45. | Lightspeed LA Last Sentinel loses 80 humans before it loses its identity crisis |
0 | |
| 46. | GM GM reshapes IT operations by removing the operators |
0 | |
| 47. | VSCO VSCO cuts staff, applies a flattering filter called 'AI-native' |
0 | |
| 48. | ServiceNow ServiceNow exec calls it life-changing, declines to say whose life |
0 | |
| 49. | Amazon Amazon's AI mandate kills the game before the players could |
0 | |
| 50. | Fiserv Fiserv finds thousands of efficiencies, calls them people |
0 |